“Making a decision to have a child–it’s momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.” – Elizabeth Stone

Sometimes, as a tarot reader, you get questions that just break your heart. One such was from this week’s reader, who wrote: I miscarried a baby very early in the pregnancy and have not been able to get pregnant since. Will my baby come to me? Do I need fertility treatments?

You have my heartfelt condolences, reader. As for a reading…well, first of all, I’m not a medical professional. So, my most important piece of advice for you is: Get thee to a doctor! They are able to run all sorts of tests and determine what, if anything, may be wrong and come up with ways to deal with it.

With that out of the way, we’ll commence doing your reading, keeping in mind that the Tarot is best suited to giving you advice on how to cope with your loss, how to prepare your mind for positive change in the future, and steps you might take to achieve it.

To keep this fairly straightforward, I did a basic three card Past, Present and Future Spread, with a fourth card pulled for Advice.

Card 1, Past: Ace of Cups

Birth of something new. Opening of the heart. New love, new spirituality. New life.

Well, we know we’re in the right zone, because in some traditions, the Ace of Cups, particularly when combined with the Empress, often presages a birth. So, having this card come up in the recent past would confirm that a spark of a new life had begun and that opened your heart to new possibilities. Anything may have felt possible.

Card 2, Present: Knight of Wands, reversed

Second guessing yourself. No energy, or conversely, running around like a chicken with its head off. Racing thoughts in an obsessive loop. No motivation for anything, or only motivation for one thing, to the exclusion of all else.

It may be time to slow down your thinking about this situation, Reader, and allow yourself to heal instead of thinking it to death. There’s a real need for calm, considered action here, and it would be better for you to see a doctor and get hard facts, rather than doing a tortuous back-and-forth with yourself when it comes to choosing a course of action. Things may seem stalled, but part of that is due to being in too big of a hurry. What is they say about a watched pot never boiling?

Card 3, Future: The Devil

Obsession. Negative thinking keeps one trapped. Getting in your own way. Feeling stifled, or trapped–but you can get out of it, any time you want.

If this is a pattern with you , Reader, now is the time to break the habit of obsessing about a goal until it makes your whole life toxic. Lighten up, enjoy the journey, and drop the agenda. Make sure to have some fun while trying to get pregnant again. It shouldn’t be a job! Put the enjoyment back into your relationship. Otherwise, you’ll only sabotage your own efforts with a mountain of worry and stress. Not great for fertility!

Card 4, Advice: King of Wands reversed

Single minded. Myopic. Tunnel vision. Too close to the situation.

This is a good time to focus on your partner, Reader. You may have become so focused that you’ve been ignoring their pain. Backing off and seeing the station from a different perspective may have beneficial results. Think long-term, not just about the immediate. Relax! You are too tightly wound!

Wrapping it up:

I suspect one of the things you may need to deal with is grief, which is natural and healthy. It may take a while for you to get pregnant again, so settle in for the long haul, chill, and enjoy the journey. And see a doctor who can tell you definitively if fertility treatments are really necessary!

I wish you the very brightest of blessings. Don’t give up!

Submit your question to Raven now using the form here. Each week, Raven will choose a question and perform a personal Tarot card reading, offering her advice, insight, and wisdom based on what the cards say.