Lady Chablis

If drag queens have taught us anything, it’s that being a completely unhinged little bitch can be a hoot-and-a-half (please see Bianca Del Rio). To this end also exists the venerable tradition of the roast (not to be confused with “the spit roast”, so please don’t embarrass yourself). The roast has been a respectable custom since the dawn of Dean Martin, whence a cast of alleged luminaries is brought together to barb their barbiest barbs at a willing victim in an atmosphere of jocular alcoholism and unbridled snark.

Last year at this time, The Capitol Hill Roast Series (headed by the lovely Jacob Rodvelt-Gamlieli) roasted the mickey out of one of Gay Seattle’s favorite punching bags, Mark “Mom” Finley. The incomparable Lady Bunny and her herculean hair flew in all the way from NYC to host the event (“I’m here today to pay tribute to my friend Mark Finley, or as she is better known, Patient Zero”. Bwahahahahaha! BURN!), and I myself had no less than 17 scathing pages of notes culled from Mom’s sordid herstory. It was an orgy of hilarious catharsis.

But they just couldn’t leave well enough alone, and so the roast rides again! (TCHRS is planning to throw two roasts per year henceforward, by the way.) And this time they shall be roasting the hip pads and heels off of another notable local drag staple: R-Place’s second most infamous queen (please see Robbie Turner), the Ladie Chablis.

It’s rumored that our dear Chablis was reticent to accept the role of roastie, as she lives in a big glass house and her venomous tongue is well-documented. But eventually the legendary appetite of drag queens  for any and all forms of attention asserted itself and prevailed. Plus, the event is “for charity” (as the kids say), with big bucks going to the republican-blasted heaths of Flint Michigan, where the livin’ ain’t easy and the water is lead.

To host the event, Chablis has selected BeBe Zahara Benet, the very first “America’s Next Drag Superstar” on RuPaul’s Drag Race Season One. Chablis, who has been dragging all over Seattle’s salty shores since God was going to Sunday school and has hosted at R-Place for even longer, has met and/or worked with every RPDR queen breathing. But BeBe is close to her heart.

“BeBe and I have a catty relationship,” Ladie Chablis tells us. “The first day we met I said something to her and she came back with a smartass answer, then I said something back to her, then we laughed, and now we’re incredible friends!”

When they were looking for a host I said it has to be BeBe”, Chablis explains “And trust me, she is coming for it… she actually said that she had other engagements but this was more important for her. Hmmmm… I wonder what she’s bringing to the mic…HA!” Other roasters include LaSaveona Hunt, Honey Bucket, Cookie and Jacob Rodvelt-Gamlieli himself.

Neighbours is donating its well-worn and hallowed halls for the show, and VIP tickets are available. So forget your filthy karma, come early, and come ready to have your eardrums scorched by the scathing wit of it all.

The Capitol Hill Roast of Ladie Chablis will happen on Sunday, May 15. Doors are at 6:30pm, the show at 7pm. Tickets are $20 (VIP is $50)  and can be purchased online at Brown Paper Tickets. This is a 21+ event.